The sacred relation of marriage ties two people in a bond where they accept each other in sickness and in health, till death do them part. In the initial period of this journey, a couple is madly in love with each other and cherishes every little detail they get to know about their partner. However, with they, start arguing majorly over the duties of each other. Both of them being blank over the issues, pave the way for the blame game in which mostly wives are targetted although, Islam has already made it easy for the couple by defining their duties. All woman getting married should thoroughly read it in order to avoid any problem arising at any stage.
“The Prophet (P.B.U.H) stated: ‘There is no better structure founded in Islam other than marriage’.”
“Imam Rida (R.A) stated: ‘The greatest gain for a man is a faithful woman who, when she sees him, becomes happy and protects his property and her own honor in his absence’.”
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RESPECT OF A HUSBAND
Being wives, you must be aware of a lot of people who don’t like your husband and insult him during the day. However, you are supposed to respect, love and support him when he returns back home from work to make him realize that they have someone who cares for him.
It might get difficult for you at times to be polite and courteous to your spouse, but in order to avoid an argument, it becomes necessary to do so. Teach your children to always give him the respect that he deserves. Plus, whenever he enters the house, open the door with a smiley face. These small things do create a good impact on the mind and heart of your husband.
“The Holy Prophet (P.B.U.H) stated: ‘The duty of a woman is to answer the call at the door and welcome her husband’.”
“Imam as-Sadiq (R.A) stated: ‘A woman who respects her husband and does not harass him, will be fortunate and prosperous’.”
“The Holy Prophet (S) stated: ‘A wife is duty-bound to arrange for a basin and towel to wash her husband’s hands’.”
COMPLAINS AND PROBLEMS
Every couple has differences in their daily lives although having a partner who could listen to your problems is definitely the best spouse. Although, it should already be remembered that there is a time and place for doing everything and one should take notes of it. Some females being selfish don’t realize that their husband just returned from work which is why he must be exhausted and is not in a mood to talk to you. Starting your list of complaints at that point will make him get irritated.
Men might not say it that often but they also do have an entire journal of problems to deal with. Your nagging attitude will make him feel guilty of ignoring his wife which is why he might leave the house for some hours to get peace somewhere else. If it’s really urgent to tell him about something, then look for a proper time and then present your problems to him.
“The Prophet (S) of Islam stated: ‘The prayers of a woman who teases her husband with her tongue, are not accepted (by Allah) even though she fasts every day, gets up for the acts of worship every night, sets free a few slaves and donates her wealth in the way of Allah. A bad-tongue woman who hurts her husband in this way is the first person who enters hell’.”
“The Holy Prophet (S) also stated: ‘The women of Paradise say to those women who abuse their husbands in this way: ‘May Allah kill you. Do not misbehave with your husband. This man (the husband) is not yours, and you do not deserve him. Soon he will leave you and come towards us’.”
DON’T EXPECT SOMETHING WRONG
Being a wife, you are in the hold of the house, so always keep a budget of the expenses. You know the amount your husband earns so try to keep things as per the amount earned. Never compare yourself to anyone and become interested in it. Compelling your husband to buy you anything would not make him like you for your forceful behavior.
Putting your husband under debt just to fulfill your wishes is not a good idea because it would make him exhausted to just go for more and more. It might get to such extent that your husband prefers suicide over dealing with any of it.
“In a tradition, the Holy Prophet (P.B.U.H) stated: ‘Any woman who is not compatible with her husband and persuades him to act beyond his capacity, then her deeds would not be accepted by Allah. She would taste the wrath of Allah on the Day of Resurrection’.”
In another Tradition, the Holy Prophet (P.B.U.H) stated:
“Any woman who is not compatible with her husband is not content with what Allah has blessed them with, and treats her husband harshly by demanding him to give more than he is able, then her acts (or worship) are not acceptable by Allah and He will be angry with her’.”
QUESTIONING YOUR HUSBAND
It’s never a wrong thing to do, but being suspicious about your husband continuously is a wrong habit. Imaging your spouse to be involved with someone else without any proof will make him lose his trust in you. Rather than doing so, compliment your husband over little things to make him realize that you are appreciative of him.
“Imam Ali (R.A) stated: ‘ Act moderately with the women in every instance. Speak to them nicely in order that their deeds become good’.”
“Imam Sajjad (R.A) stated: ‘One of the rights of a woman upon her husband is that he should forgive her ignorance and foolishness’.”
“The Prophet of Allah (P.B.U.H) stated: ‘ Any man who copes with his incompetent wife, the Almighty Allah, upon his patience (towards his wife) on every occasion, would grant him the reward of patience of Hadrat Ayyub (a.s)’.”
DON’T TALK TO ANY OTHER MAN NICELY
Once you’re married, only your husband should be of great importance and not anyone else. Now, you shouldn’t find anyone more attractive and talk nicely to him because it would give the other person a signal that you’re still looking for another person.
“Narrated by Umm Salamah, Ummul Mu’minin:
I was with the Apostle of Allah (PBUH) while Maymunah was with him. Then Ibn Umm Maktum came. This happened when we were ordered to observe veil (purdah). The Prophet (PBUH) said: Observe veil from him. We asked: Apostle of Allah! is he not blind? He can neither see us nor recognize us. The Prophet (PBUH) said upon this: Are both of you blind? Do you not see him? You see him even if he doesn’t see you.” (Dawud, Book 32, Hadith 4100)
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