A tale old as time, yet everyone seems to forget it!
As she swiftly walks in her lehenga, covered in jewels and ornaments with the Quran over her head, quivering with fear she hopes and prays that the hand she has decided to hold would comfort her for the rest of her life.
As she walks into her new room, filled with the scent of roses which guarded the bed or the stage where she is supposed to perform to her fullest without flinching, where she is supposed to bleed while her menstrual blood is considered taboo, where she can act like a whore but otherwise she cannot even talk about sex. Is this bed her destiny? Is this her only purpose in life? Does she have the right to say ‘NO’?
A girl who was eagerly wed to a man of high status, a girl whose parents were proud to have found such a remarkable match, a girl who had so many dreams has now lost the light from her eyes. That girl has become a woman who now cries to sleep every night and winces when she hears the footsteps of her husband.
How could she have known that she would be subjected to a situation so ugly, a dilemma so shameful that she couldn’t even imagine sharing with her own mother? To the husband, it was her duty to please him selflessly, to succumb to his desires. To be his whore, his prostitute,’ his’ and then this act of force was followed by mistreating her and she now pretends to smile when people visit, little do they know about the scars she hides.
Discussing marital rape has earned a status of taboo. Our social makeup, the cultural setup has somewhat injected the holier than thou attitude where the victims are shunned and are held equally punishable let alone comfort. The social norms entwined with religious teachings, which should have actually made the culture just, has fallen into the hands of a bunch of people who use religion as a tool and personify hypocrisy to the finest.
This has become a part of many marital lives in our society, this has been kept away in fear of further oppression. We have become indifferent to the evils which are frequently committed. We have become numb and are scared to voice this plight.
We forget the real teachings of our religion and accept the versions which are twisted by the fanatics and accepted at large because of our male dominant culture. We are fuelling the tyrants without knowing that our loved ones could be subjected to their tyranny.