Like other aspects of our life, Islam has given us a complete code of conduct for dating or approaching a girl/boy for marriage. Almighty Allah has given the right to both Muslim men and women to choose their life partner. In fact, if the guardian of the spouse has arranged a marriage, the decision is left up to the person whether they want to get married or not.
Here are the guidelines Almighty Allah and Messenger of Allah (PBUH) has told us about dating.
1. Don’t Go For Dating Secretly
Allah says in Quran that,
There is no blame upon you for that to which you [indirectly] allude concerning a proposal to women or for what you conceal within yourselves. Allah knows that you will have them in mind. But do not promise them secretly except for saying a proper saying. And do not determine to undertake a marriage contract until the decreed period reaches its end. And know that Allah knows what is within yourselves, so beware of Him. And know that Allah is Forgiving and Forbearing – Surah Baqarah, verse 235
2. A Couple Must Be Accompanied By A Family Member Or Friend
Ibn Juraij narrated: “No person (man) should be alone with a woman except when there is a Mahram with her.” – Sahih Muslim, Book 15, Hadith 478
3. Both Of Them Should Guard Their Vision
While dating, the couple should keep guard their vision as Almighty Allah says in Quran that,
Tell the believing men to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts. That is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is Acquainted with what they do. And tell the believing women to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts and not expose their adornment except that which [necessarily] appears thereof and to wrap [a portion of] their headcovers over their chests and not expose their adornment – Surah Nur, verse 30 – 31
4. Dating Period Shouldn’t Be Prolonged
According to various Quranic verses and hadiths, it has been observed that a couple should know about the purpose of dating. Islam allows meeting a non-mahram with given limitations until or unless they have a purpose for that. The reason why Islam permits dating because in this way the couple would know the compatibility between each other. It is also recommended to get married soon after dating since taking a long time will only lead a couple to annoyance or a sin.
And verily Allah knows the best!
