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Today, I am going to discuss a topic which is still considered a taboo in our culture. Yeah, menstruation, menses or periods. To me, menses are my best friend ever. Don’t laugh. My life was simple when I never had them. But once I hit puberty, they have been my best friends forever. They visit me each and every month and when they don’t come to visit me, I know that I am in trouble.
Menstruation, commonly known as periods (but my friends and I used to call them ‘auntie’ in our university days, so we can easily talk about them openly. For example, “I am not feeling well, my auntie is visiting me and you know I don’t even like her”) and nobody would bother knowing which auntie are we even talking about. Periods are good for women all around the world for medical reasons. But today, I am going to discuss my best friend, my periods who been with me in every health condition, I make sure they arrive at the right time. If not, then it is a clear sign that something is wrong.
They keep my health on spot. Because, when the egg is released and there is no sperm catching them or no other pathology happening in my ‘vajajay’, the egg drops and my friend is here to give me the much-needed break from my routine.
Now, here is a point. Do they really give me a break from my routine life? How could anybody know about them? Okay, as per my religion, Islam and Pakistani culture, we have certain issues dangling with my best friend. Religiously, women are not allowed to pray or get intimate with their husbands. And to be honest, it’s the best thing for any married women. I mean you can have continuous sleep at night for seven days. It is a heavenly feeling (I don’t mean that we women don’t have intercourse breaks, but imagine sleeping like an angel).
And before marriage, they are surety of your health if they are fine you won’t get any facial hair, acne or mood swings, you don’t get sad unnecessary because your best friends take care of you every month. You might be thinking that I am some old crazy bat praising PERIODS like hell. But really, as I am getting older, I am loving them more and I know, one day they will leave me and I will be all alone; cranky and think my femininity is rubbed off.
But to be honest, I may be the only one who thinks periods are amazing. However, our society is full of taboos and myths regarding periods. So let’s discuss some that we’re all aware of. There is a myth that flowers would die if a woman who’s menstruating; waters them, you cannot shower or otherwise, your health will deteriorate, cold drinks make your cramps worst. Also, in some houses, they don’t let women cook or eat with the family as the woman is NAPAAK. People use your menstrual blood for jadoo tona, and much more.
They tell young girls to hide and be ashamed of their bodies which is actually the worst thing we do as a mother. It triggers self-esteem issues in young girls. I saw my maid crying her heart out when her 13-year-old had her periods and that she has to take care of her like a little girl. My maid was uneducated but I have even see educated families who hide their daughters getting menses like they have Satan in their pants. Why? Even some advertisements have never tried to be creative, they have always focused on how the pads or tampons can be hidden.
In our household, old women have all the authority on issues relating to periods and their conversation usually starts with? “HUMEN TO AISA KUCH NAI HOTA THA” which is totally wrong. Every woman has different symptoms of periods. PMS is the most denied feeling of our society. Our old aunties screamed at their loudest voice that it’s not real by saying, “AAJ KAL KI LARKIYO K NAKHREY”. Aunties, please tell me why did science decide to name it and made a list of all the symptoms? And it’s nobody’s business if a woman takes a day off on her first day of periods and we don’t have to tell anyone. And I mean it.
To be more specific, our religion doesn’t agree with these. To make periods less obvious, Islam has strictly given guidelines so other people don’t have to know what the woman is going through. Well, because goddammit, it’s none of your business and it’s not moderate thinking to make them obvious, only my spouse and I have right to know that when I am bleeding or not.
But in our ‘Indian’ inspired culture, we tend to do each and every one by banish them outside the home or not let them cook just because the girl is menstruating. It’s a woman’s personal affair. Does every man out there tell each and everybody that, “I just ejaculated and I need some rest”? It’s our personal space; we choose to tell people. The people have no right to tell us what to do and what not to when we are visited by our ‘best friend’.
You must be thinking I am must be on my menopause and missing them terribly, it’s not the case. All I want is that our young girls should own their bodies and get comfortable in their own skin. And by this, they can take care of their vaginal hygiene much more comfortably. To be honest, they are our best friends and our culture turned them into something monstrous.
