When you come across stories regarding a woman who experienced some sort of harassment on the street, you will see many people defending it. From “Not all men” to “maybe she is just making this up”, one gets bombarded with all sorts of negativity which diverts attention from the main notion.
Given how harassment happens in broad daylight in different parts of the world, it doesn’t make it okay. Be it India, the country where women are raped on the streets or be it the USA, where workplace harassment is ranks at the top, it is everywhere.
In Pakistan, however, if someone talks about harassment over the internet, it concludes more towards “defaming the country” or victim-blaming.
Having that said, Sidra Amin recently wrote a Twitter thread on the difficulties she has experienced in Pakistan only because she is a woman. Her thread was relatable to many women who voiced their concerns as well.
The Tandoor Debate – Men Usually “Brag” About Being Able to Stand in Long Ques of a Tandoor when Debating About “Equality”
Being a woman in Pakistan.
Thread:
1. I am physically & financially able to buy roti from tandoor but I have to send a bhai/kaam wala instead because men wouldn’t like it. But then, when men bring me down, their question is, “Have you ever waited in a line in a tandoor?”
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 25, 2017
Or Just Follow You, Throw their Numbers At You, Drift Past You or Even Roll Down their Windows to Laugh at You
2. You’re physically & financially able to drive a car but you can’t because every other man on the road thinks it is their duty to either cross you, catcall you, stare at you, or just race against your car to make you realize they are better drivers.
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 25, 2017
Kisko Acha Nahi Lagta? To People Who We Don’t Even Know?
3. You can’t do certain things at workplace that you can otherwise do easily because, “bibi jee, aisay na karen, acha nahi lagta.”
Had no place to sit at in HMC because yahan na bethen, acha nahi lagta, wahan na bethen acha nahi lagta. Bibi ji ended up standing for 6hrs.
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 25, 2017
Undermining Women With Achievements to Satisfy Egos!
4. You’re automatically rendered incapable of achieving things because “aurat zehni taur par mard sy thori kamzor hai.”
So if I do any projects, achieve awards, or do something extraordinary, either it was “the woman card” or a man helped me out in it.
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 25, 2017
Nobody Likes to be Stared by Random Nobodies. NOBODY!
5. It is okay to stare at you because of your gender, even if you look very normal, aren’t overdressed, and have no horns on your head.
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 25, 2017
LOLOL!
6. Everytime you try and make sense, you have innumerable index fingers pointed at you because your opinion is hard to digest.
A hajmola for helping in digesting opinions will have a potential market in Pakistan.
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 25, 2017
To Sum It All Up
I have just mentioned some of the little things we experience. I haven't even touched the heinous crimes committed against women. Many men(and women) told me on the thread that Islam gives you the complete guide to live your life. My Islam taught me to stand for myself & others.
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 27, 2017
Just Because Something Like This Doesn’t Happen Around Doesn’t Mean They Don’t Exist
Many men(and women) also taught me that I am probably living in stone age and their version of Pakistan doesn't have it this bad. Congratulations to you, and more power to the empowered women that you have around. It is people like you who have to make the world a safe space.
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 27, 2017
Spot On!
But the world doesn't become a safe place for others when you deny bad things are happening because they aren't happening around you, or because your interpretation of religion makes the bad okay. If something is making someone feel bad, the religion probably doesn't support it.
— Sidra. Amin. (@Sidraaminq) December 27, 2017
If you are a man and you are reading this article and you do not make women go through all the struggles Sidra Amin stated, good on you. May the world have more people like you. But that does not deny the facts and figures that show how women have been undermined and harassed throughout the decades.
Acknowledging how these issues are present in Pakistan as well as in different parts of the world is the first step to understanding your societal responsibility!