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Marriage, in Pakistan, is a legal union between a man and a woman. Culturally, it is not only a link between the husband and wife but also an alliance between their respective families. Because about 97% of Pakistan’s population is Muslim the Islamic law (Sharia) is usually observed. From last many years, we the Muslims of the modern world have also adopted many Indian and British traditions of marriage. The celebrations of this occasion are not less than an Eid for the respective families of bride and groom.

Usually, these weddings comprise of festivities like the marriage proposal, engagement, date fixing, dholak days/weekends, mayoon, mehndi, sehra bandi, nikaah, rukhsati (baraat), maklawa and end the celebration with valima reception ceremony. Once the celebration ends, there will be the arrangements for bride & groom for the honeymoon trip to out of town/city/country. Then there will be the dinner invitations for the new couple from all families. The northern areas of Pakistan are usually chosen as the honeymoon destination; however well-off families prefer overseas honeymoon trip.

All these festivities spread happiness in the whole family. The culture and traditions show love and unity of families and blessing of elders. All the fun of wedding festivities signifies the blessings of the families upon the married couple for a content marriage life.

Before the start of these wedding celebrations, there are plenty of pre-wedding expenses for both families of bride and groom. The luxurious embroidered dresses, jewelry of both bride & groom along with their family members. The basic home necessities like electrical appliances including fridge, TV, kitchen items, washing machines, furniture and lots of more items. The level of expenditures on marriages is different regarding the financial status of the families but nowadays, people literally compete with each other to show their dominance in terms of extravagance and lavishness.

The homes of bride & groom before the wedding is called shadi wala ghar by rest of the family due to the ongoing pre-wedding preparations and festivities. These weddings are fun when the family is rich enough to afford all these expenses for the wedding. In case the bride or groom’s family is not able to carry all these expenses of the wedding than the same festivities become a burden for the family. The traditions and cultural bounding forces ones to bear the expenses at any cost to continue the wedding festivities.

Other families force the groom/bride family to bear these expenses for the reputation of khandaan (family). The groom or bride’s father becomes overburden by taking high-interest loans to bear the wedding expenses. With the happiness and blessing of the wedding in the home, there also comes the depression and stress against the loans and payable amounts for the luxurious celebrations, dinners, festivities, decorations, and plenty more things.

Nowadays it is compulsory for every family to do such showing-off expenses for a wedding whether they can afford or not. It is becoming more difficult these days to decide on the marriage. Families keep delaying the marriages of their children by thinking about these expenses and the money they need for the dowry (Jahez) or haq maher.

For the bride’s family, there is a huge expenditure in form of dowry (jahez) which includes almost everything for the groom’s house including furniture, home appliances, car, clothes, and plenty more things. It’s almost impossible for poor people to bear the burden of this trendy dowry formality. Groom’s family also submits the list of their demands against this dowry which becomes compulsory for bride’s father to fulfill till the wedding days.

Not just the burden for the bride’s family, there is a list of expenses on the groom’s family too. Groom is bound to pay a huge amount of Haq Maher to the bride in the shape of security to keep her happy as his wife. After that, the groom also needs to purchase the jewelry for the bride to wear on the wedding festivals. He needs to spend the amount more than his annual income if he draws a handsome amount as salary.

As per the current financial position of Pakistan’s population, there are more than 80% people which earn below PKR 100,000/month. Most of these are scared from bearing the expense of the wedding. If we save the amount we are spending on wedding and help the poor for the marriages of their children as per Islamic Shariah, then we would be able to help everyone in this country in getting married.

This is the same reason why the rate of sexual abuse is increasing in our country. Once the children start getting married at their right age, this is how we can help the nation in controlling the crime rate in the country. You and I can start from today in discouraging these luxurious way of marriages and force the families to adopt shariah in these celebrations, haq maher, and dowry.

This would also bless the couple to live happily after getting married in the light of Shariah instead of paying loans in following years which could become more difficult for the couple to live happily with a shortage of sufficient funds for day-to-day expenses.